Pixel Scroll 4/11/18 Today’s Pixel Scroll Takes Place In An Alternate Universe Timeline!

(1) CITIZEN ROBOTS. Politico covers the latest legal uproar about robots:

Autonomous robots with humanlike, all-encompassing capabilities might still be decades away, but lawmakers, legal experts and manufacturers are already locked in a high-stakes debate about their legal status: whether it’s these machines or human beings who should bear ultimate responsibility for their actions. Last year, Luxembourgish MEP Mady Delvaux kicked a hornets’ nest when the Legal Affairs Committee suggested that self-learning robots could be granted some form of “electronic personality,” so they can be held liable for damage they cause if they go rogue….

No thanks: The opposition has galvanized. In a letter to the European Commission, seen by POLITICO, 156 artificial intelligence experts hailing from 14 European countries, including computer scientists, law professors and CEOs, warn that granting robots legal personhood would be “inappropriate” from a “legal and ethical perspective.” And as each side turns up the volume on its advocacy and lobbying, one thing is clear: Money is pouring into the field of robotics, and the debate is only set to turn louder.

See Janosch Delcker’s full story, “Europe divided over robot ‘personhood’”.

Think lawsuits involving humans are tricky? Try taking an intelligent robot to court.

While autonomous robots with humanlike, all-encompassing capabilities are still decades away, European lawmakers, legal experts and manufacturers are already locked in a high-stakes debate about their legal status: whether it’s these machines or human beings who should bear ultimate responsibility for their actions.

The battle goes back to a paragraph of text, buried deep in a European Parliament report from early 2017, which suggests that self-learning robots could be granted “electronic personalities.” Such a status could allow robots to be insured individually and be held liable for damages if they go rogue and start hurting people or damaging property.

Those pushing for such a legal change, including some manufacturers and their affiliates, say the proposal is common sense. Legal personhood would not make robots virtual people who can get married and benefit from human rights, they say; it would merely put them on par with corporations, which already have status as “legal persons,” and are treated as such by courts around the world.

This situation was anticipated decades ago by Alexis Gilliland’s character Corporate Skashkash in the Rosinante series.

(2) TOUGH SPOT. The commercial lives up to AdWeek’s promise: “This Film Festival’s Bleak, Intense Look Into the Future Will Leave You Feeling Frayed”.

As sure as the jacaranda trees bloom every spring in Southern California, the Newport Beach Film Festival launches a quirky, cinematic work of art to promote its weeklong event.

This year is no exception, with a beautiful and brutal 3-minute spot that looks like it could’ve been lifted directly from the mind of Ridley Scott. Instead, it’s the creation of director Jillian Martin, production company Untitled.tv and agency Garage Team Mazda in its first campaign for the festival.

“Quota: Who Made the Cut” centers on two beaten-down miners in space suits dangling by ropes from a massive, alien edifice, mining for crystal with hand drills and bad attitudes.

Are they the future’s exploited working class? Prisoners? They may be both. They’re certainly in competition with one another to find a mother lode of the precious substance and earn their way back home.

Their only respite from the bleak, oppressive scenario are VR memories from home now and again, which don’t so much provide the rest they need as remind them of the life they’re missing. Those vivid images they see in their fitful waking sleep—a lover with whip cream on a taut belly, for one—are both a tease and an incentive.

No wonder things get violent.


(3) SHIMMER PROGRAM. Steven H Silver’s SF Site News was first with the winners of the Shimmer Program’s stipends, Shi Ran (Sharon Shi) and Lin Jiayu (Mackenzie Lin), who each will get RMB 10,000 to attend and help staff Worldcon 76 in San Jose, California. Bios of the winners are available on Facebook at this link.

Mike Willmoth, Facilities DDH of Worldcon 76, and Yang Sumin, winner of Worldcon 75 Attending Funding & Media Event AH of Worldcon 75, worked as judges for the selection.

(4) JAMES PATRICK KELLY. Steven H Silver’s Black Gate series continues with “Birthday Reviews: James Patrick Kelly’s ‘Rat’”.

Kelly won the Hugo Award for his novelettes “Think Like a Dinosaur” and “1016 to 1.” His novella Burn won the Nebula Award as well as the Italia Award. His works have also been nominated for the Seiun Award, the Gaylactic Spectrum Award, the James Tiptree, Jr. Award, and the Theodore Sturgeon Memorial Award. He is the author most published in Asimov’s Science Fiction Magazine, with both fiction and a regular column appearing in the magazine.

(5) D’OH. This is the government’s best advice: “FCC On Hawaii’s Bogus Alert: Don’t Say ‘This Is Not A Drill’ During Drills”.

The Federal Communications Commission recommended on Tuesday that emergency workers drop the phrase “This is not a drill” when conducting emergency alert exercises.

A final report on a false missile alert, which left Hawaii residents fearing for their lives for 38 minutes, offered analysis on what went awry within the state’s emergency management agency and guidance on how to avoid more false warnings.

(6) PACIFIC RIMSHOT. The wheels on the jaeger go round and round…. “The World of Pacific Rim Uprising, A 360 Experience.”

(7) FOR TEN YEARS WE’VE BEEN ON OUR OWN. Marvel Cinematic Universe pays tribute to fans:

(8) FAMILY DRAMA. But it’s been a tough decade for Marvel’s iconic Stan Lee says The Hollywood Reporter: “Stan Lee Needs a Hero: Elder Abuse Claims and a Battle Over the Aging Marvel Creator”.

Back in early February, fighting what he later called “a little bout of pneumonia,” 95-year-old Stan Lee had an argument with his 67-year-old daughter, J.C. This was hardly unusual, but it seems to have been a breaking point.

The comic book legend — whose creative tenure at the helm of Marvel Comics beginning in New York in the early 1960s spawned Spider-Man, Black Panther and the X-Men and laid the foundation for superhero dominance in Hollywood that continues with the April 27 release of Avengers: Infinity War — sat in the office of his attorney Tom Lallas and signed a blistering declaration.

The Feb. 13 document, obtained by The Hollywood Reporter, begins with some background, explaining that Lee and his late wife had arranged a trust for their daughter because she had trouble supporting herself and often overspent. “It is not uncommon for J.C. to charge, in any given month, $20,000 to $40,000 on credit cards, sometimes more,” the document states. It goes on to describe how, when he and his daughter disagree — “which is often” — she “typically yells and screams at me and cries hysterically if I do not capitulate.”

Lee explains that J.C. will, “from time to time,” demand changes to her trust, including the transfer of properties into her name. He has resisted such changes, he states, because they “would greatly increase the likelihood of her greatest fear: that after my death, she will become homeless and destitute.”

(9) HOUSTON? This may not be what you remember when somebody mentions Apollo 13. Popular Science looks into the question: “Is a hot dog a sandwich? The Apollo 13 astronauts had some thoughts”.

During Apollo 13, Commander Jim Lovell settled the age old question of whether or not a hot dog is a sandwich in a communication with CAPCOM Joe Kerwin. Lovell did, however, screw up the question of “mustard or catsup” on a hot dog.

Jim Lovell (Commander): Hello Houston, Apollo 13.

Joe Kerwin (CAPCOM & Lead [White Team] Flight Director): Houston. Go ahead.

Lovell: Just a passing comment Joe, we’re having lunch right now and I just made myself a hot dog sandwich with catsup. Very tasty and almost unheard of in the old days.

Kerwin: That’s correct 13. As I recall the flight plan, you’re supposed to put mustard on the hot dogs and not catsup but I guess we’ll overlook that.

Jack Swigert (Command Module Pilot): We blew it.

Lovell: Right.

Kerwin: How’s everything going?

Lovell: About pretty good. We have about 4 different methods of spreading catsup, right now.

…but according to the book Apollo 13, co-written by the astronaut himself, the crew actually got quite a kick out of the frozen hot dogs, bouncing them off the walls of the cockpit.

The article has much more info about space cuisine, with the perhaps sad note that hot dogs are no longer on the menu for the International Space Station.

(10) ITS CUSTOMERS ARE PEOPLE! Gizmodo cheerful headline announces, “Good News, You Will Soon Be Able to Disrupt Eating Actual Food By Buying Soylent At Walmart”.

Per the Verge, Soylent’s maker Rosa Foods announced on Wednesday that it is bringing the signature brand of packaged, flavored sludge—which takes its name from the disheartening 1973 dystopian film Soylent Green, where it’s eventually revealed the product’s key ingredient is uh, “long pig”—to 450 Walmart stores across the country. Soylent CEO Bryan Crowley added in a statement that the move is “a significant step in providing more ways for consumers to get access to our brand,” expanding beyond its current placement in 7-Eleven stores.

[Thanks to JJ, John King Tarpinian, Steven H Silver, Chip Hitchcock, Mike Kennedy, Martin Morse Wooster, Cat Eldridge, Nicholas Whyte, and Carl Slaughter for some of these stories. Title credit goes to File 770 contributing editor of the day JJ.]

73 thoughts on “Pixel Scroll 4/11/18 Today’s Pixel Scroll Takes Place In An Alternate Universe Timeline!

  1. 8) Stan Lee’s woes indeed sound very sad. A pity that his daughter seems to have zero financial sense at all.

    10) I’ve never gotten the point of meal replacement products like Soylent. Eating is fun and cooking is fun, so even if you have little time, why would you bother with crap like Soylent, when there are so many better options available. Not to mention that their choice of name is hugely tone deaf.

  2. 10) I’ve never gotten the point of meal replacement products like Soylent. Eating is fun and cooking is fun, so even if you have little time, why would you bother with crap like Soylent,

    “Cooking is fun” is a highly subjective opinion, personally I absolutely see the point of food that doesn’t require that I spend time on cooking before eating. Not to mention not doing the dishes after.

    However, I am sceptical to this kind of drinkable meal replacement – in my experience texture, and variations in taste and texture between bites, is usually a large part of a good meal. For the kind of quick lunch that Soylent seems to deliver, I would prefer nuts or crackers rather than some sort of artificially flavoured sludge.

  3. 10) I can understand not having the time or energy to cook (yes, it’s fun, but it can also be disproportionately draining especially when eating alone), but I’m one of those reprehensible humans who would always choose a nutritionally disastrous but tasty corner shop ready meal over a mix-your-own flavoured sludge.

    Then again, I have weird executive functioning issues when it comes to cooking, where “put X in blender and blend with water” feels like more effort than “chop onion and two other vegetables and sautee with some tinned tomatoes and some mixed spice”. Also I actively prioritise not letting stress overtake my mealtimes or appetite. Also I’m with Cora in thinking the cultural reference is utterly bizarre. So I guess I’m just not the right audience for this…

  4. 10) On the one hand, this, from Twitter:

    Trans transhumanists: omg what if hot-swappable body parts? Real functioning tails and cat ears? Permanently purple hair?
    Cis transhumanists: with this nootropic stack and optimized nutrient slurry my tragic meat machine is 8% more efficient at converting calories into javascript

    But on the other hand, I know of several neurodiverse people who find Soylent is the perfect regular or occasional solution to their difficulties with food. So while I’m not a fan of Soylent myself, I’m OK with it existing.

  5. Arstechnica has an article with good comments on why some people like Soylent, here’s the link:


    A number of the points ring true for me. These days I usually cook for myself. To me, cooking is a chore (I don’t think I’ve ever considered it fun), as is keeping stocked up with ingredients (especially those that don’t stay fresh for long). I often will go for quick to prepare, easy to store food rather than stuff that will take time and work and require fresh ingredients. Often I’ll just buy something at the many food places near me.

    I haven’t tried Soylent yet. I suspect I wouldn’t like the flavor or texture, but I’ll probably try it one of these days. If I can eat it, it might well be a healthier option, at least for some meals.

    As for the name: In “Make Room, Make Room” it originally referred to a food made from soy and lentils, not people. The movie also had different varieties of soylent, it was just the latest product, soylent green, that had the, ah, unfortunate ingredient.

    I think this real company made a good choice with the name – It has gotten them lots of free advertising. I’ve seen articles about this stuff on a number of tech and science fiction oriented sites. I suspect many of their customers never would have heard of them without the attention the product received due to the name.

  6. 9) In NYC, at least, ketchup on hot dogs is for kids. When you are an adult, you graduate to mustard. And what Chicago does to Hot Dogs, like what they do to Pizza, is just wrong…

    I never understood the appeal of Bratwurst, though, until I moved out here.

    @arifel…so what I do is cook in a batch on a weekend and reheat throughout the week, because yeah, cooking and eating alone day after day IS draining.

  7. Here in Timeline 3AL-MEW, we have successfully thrown off the yoke of our feline masters, though the Treaty of Prrr-Yowl mandates a steady supply of Treatz.


  8. Whenever I hear about Soylent, this is what springs to mind:


    But I’m glad it’s there for folks that can appreciate it.

    Put me down in the cook-once-reheat-many-times camp — I tend to make Indian food, mostly of the “bits of meat or veg in spicy sauce” variety, because it freezes, thaws & reheats very well, and I can pair it with some leftover rice to get something that approximates a meal.

  9. (10) I agree that Soylent is an odd choice for a name. I like “Bachelor Chow” from Futurama, myself.

    Also (10), YouTube doesn’t seem to have a video of Phil Hartman in the “Space” episode of NewsRadio, delivering the ad spot: “Brought to you by Soylent Green, in regular flavor and new vanilla nut flavor. It’s People! Made from the finest stuff on Earth: It’s People!” (Text approximately correct.)

    He’s a blogger with a file. She’s a cat sleeping on it. Together, they scroll pixels!

  10. Well, I really enjoy cooking and planning meals (and I usually post the results of my efforts on Twitter), but there are days where I don’t have the time or energy to cook either. I do have a bunch of quick pantry pasta or jazzed up Ramen noodle recipes for such days. And if that’s still too much work, I’d much rather buy a premade sandwich or salad or soup, get some falafel and hummus, open a can of soup or baked beans or order a pizza than drink/eat Soylent. There are so many excellent choices available, including some that you can literally eat at your desk, if necessary. And the paradox of choice is something I have never understood. I like having lots of choices.

    So except for some cases of neurodiverse, disabled or ill people (e.g. my wheelchair bound aunt was given protein shakes to help her build up her atrophied muscles again), I don’t really see the point. The points made in the article someone linked above don’t persuade me either.

  11. I guess the whole “cooking is fun!” / “cooking is the worst!” thing falls into “tastes differ”.

    Me, I like cooking. Enough that I was (for a while) considering making it work, rather than play. And while I don’t understand how people can not enjoy cooking, I realise that it’s a comprehension failure on my part, and not everyone needs to like the same things as me (are we back in salmiak strawberry territory again?).

  12. (5) General pixels, general pixels! All fans man your posting stations. Set condition: Reading throughout the blog and make reports to DC Central. Reason for general pixels: space-time leak in WordPress engine room 770. This is NOT a drill!

  13. Well, Soylant Green sounds kind of “ick”. For the film punchline, it was meant to be. I had made jokes on FB that it was made out of North Koreans.

    On the other hand, you have cat food, often dubbed by the poor and elderly as “Senior Vittles”. I’ve known more than one person who has survived for a few weeks, sampling kitten cuisine,. when jobs and money were scarce.

  14. Well, Soylent Green sounds kind of “ick”. For the film punchline, it was meant to be. I had made jokes on FB that it was made out of North Koreans.

    On the other hand, you have cat food, often dubbed by the poor and elderly as “Senior Vittles”. I’ve known more than one person who has survived for a few weeks, sampling kitten cuisine,. when jobs and money were scarce.

  15. I’m strictly a food is fuel person, but I can’t imagine having a drink as a meal. No matter how nutritious it is, I would need something solid to feel like I’ve eaten. But I do know someone who has a soylent meal once a week or so and seems to like it.

  16. I saw a story about soylent and Walmart yesterday. From that: at least one of their flavors is Coffiest. I’ve never tried it, but if I did, bet I’d want at least three cups with every meal and a pot by the bed at night…

  17. @Ingvar I have the lack of comprehension when it comes to playing with sword-like objects – how can you not enjoy that, regardless of style and equipment? But there are, apparently, lots of people who have no interest in grabbing a hilt and waving a thing around.

    Salmiak and strawberries, as you say. One a delightful gift from the gods, the other an abomination unto Nuggan, the invasive crawling plants spouting the unmentionable red atrocities only fit to burn; the fields should be salted and shunned for seven generations, and let’s never talk about them again.

  18. The thing in the UK seems to be Huel. I have a few friends who have it as one or more of their meals on a pretty regular basis. I can see the appeal, especially back when I had a real 9-5 job and was alternating between martial arts and climbing every evening, but I like the the taste of real food too much to give it up.

  19. @Kip W: In addition to Bachelor Chow, “Futurama” also had “Soylent Cola” (“How does it taste?” “It varies from person to person”)

  20. @2: that’s one hell of an effort just to advertise a festival.

    @8: I would have more sympathy for Stan Lee if there were fewer reports from people outside his circle about (e.g.) characters they developed that he now claims (and gets royalties on) — but nobody deserves this kind of s**tstorm.

    @9: The article makes clear that the transcript solves nothing; in those days, I heard “hot dog sandwich” as a term for frankfurters sliced lengthwise and then cut in 2-3 pieces so they’d lie flat on sandwich-sliced bread (cf the text after the transcript). Whether frankfurter-in-a-splitroll was also a sandwich was not discussed. This has been your daily report from the nitpicking and flyspecking committee….

    @Cora: Eating is fun and cooking is fun, For some people it’s just refueling. These people are not necessarily in any of the categories you cite in a later comment; neither are they the desperate ones cited in the Ars Technica link. verb. sap.

    @Sirignano: It looks as if Stan Lee is doing for his daughter what Isaac Asimov did for his son. That’s debatable. Asimov’s autobiography read to me when it came out as if he doted on his daughter and second-tracked his son; JC is an only child, who may have been spoiled once the Lees could afford it, but probably didn’t start that way and didn’t have anyone to split affections with.

    @Paul Weimer: I never heard of putting ketchup on dogs when I was a kid; no graduation to mustard was required. (And the first thing I put on fries was mustard, although that was in a teenage rebellion phase — back when The Scottish Place was advertising sales in 8 figures I ate their fries ungarnished.) Granted, I was in something of a mustard family; we had Gulden’s Brown when yellow “mustard” was standard, and Dijon before it was fashionable (and my mother claimed her grandmother had eaten such mustard straight) — but I don’t remember seeing other kids put ketchup on dogs either.

    @Stobor: an interesting article. I do like his dissection of people’s issues with cooking, although the initial whipping up a wonderful pan-seared salmon with a bit of olive oil takes literally less than 10 minutes. leaves out (even in a tolerably-equipped household) finding acceptable salmon and cleaning up the mess left by searing. One of the looking-with-alarm cites reminds me of the “bowling alone” to-do from a couple of decades ago, which doesn’t make me take it seriously.

    @Stoic Cynic: Coffiest? Really? Now that is tone-deaf.

  21. (1) No, machines are not anywhere near at the point that they can take legal responsibility for anything. Still on the people, sorry.V

    (8) Very sad.

    (10) I hate cooking. Cooking is a chore.

    But I want real food, not drinkable food substitutes. Cooking is a last resort, but I do it when necessary. I’ll leave liquid meal substitutes to other people.

  22. Normally, I cook a one-pot dish during the weekend and eat it for dinner all week long. Oatmeal (on the savory side) is for breakfast and foil-lined boxes of soup are good for the office lunch. However, this weekend I am going to a music festival right outside of Washington DC so I stocked up on frozen food instead of cooking. Frozen pizza is one of my super-weaknesses. 🙂

  23. Of SFFal note: I’ve read at least 2 books recently (Hines’ Terminal Alliance, Chambers’ A Closed and Common Orbit) in which humans are living on liquid diets. Neither author addressed the fact that 1. introducing ANY solid food, no matter how good it tastes, would be a shock to the system–there would be Consequences, end to end; and 2. not-chewing will have major effects on the shape of the face, in particular on whether the teeth fit into the jaw. (this latter is especially the case for the Chambers book, where the humans in question are children)

    The science:

    the mandible, in contrast to the cranium, significantly reflects subsistence strategy rather than neutral genetic patterns

    i.e. nurture beats nature, for the jawline

  24. 10) I’m not the target audience, being a foodie and an avid cook. But I have had friends use it as a kind of calorie control for meals during the week. They can specifically determine the caloric intake they want, measure it out, and have complete control over it. Especially for people who work in deadline driven jobs like programming, project management, etc, Soylent and similar options are popular because forgetting to eat (or not having time to) and being affected by blood suger crashes, fainting, and the like is a real problem.

  25. This Soylent thing reminds me more about Robin Sloans Sourdough than, well, Soylent Green (Spellchecker knows „Soylent“ and suggests „Green“ BTW): There the protagonist works for a tech firm and the coders (and she) all drink some protein juice, that sounds quite like Soylent, so they don’t have to waste time to cook or eat.
    I wonder if Sloan have read early reports about this „Dish“.

    „Soylent is a dish best served refrigerated“

  26. Chip Hitchcock: I encountered Isaac’s son in an elevator in 1971 at Noreascon. He was not a happy kid, and the exchange between father and son was kind of gruff. He was not enjoying himself. In another work, Isaac Asimov felt his son was not good interacting with people and left him an annuity. I can’t speculate more.

  27. Doctor Science: I had noticed that in the Hines, and was wondering about the gastro-intestinal effect. And it’s even in a book where jokes about bodily functions would be perfectly the norm. OTOH, it isn’t quite the same as introduction from childhood; these people were all “ferals” (Ie, zombies) for a while, and I believe the disaster was recent enough they may have been normal humans before that. So not born with a bland liquid cuisine, though they’ve been on it for months to years at this point.

    It’s implied in a lot of other ways that the race that helped re-uplift them is failing them compared to what we were; they might be taking any subsequent change to facial structure the way humans treat some reactions by animals in captivity: “We’re doing the best we can but haven’t solved why that bit doesn’t work the same.”

    (Haven’t read Chambers’ second book yet.)

  28. My sons are both picky eaters – my younger one less so, thankfully, but J, the elder, definitely has some issues with strange or even slightly-different-from-the-usual-presentation foods. (It almost certainly goes with being on the spectrum. A’s pickiness is in line with typical kidness). We still use the fruit-and-veggie puree mixes meant for infants as a treat to sneak in some extra veggies (He loves fruit, but his selection of acceptable vegetables is, um, small.) He also has favourite quite solid foods, so I’m not worried, but sometimes it’s the easiest way to get him past whatever his issue is, taste or texture or look.

    I can easily see him graduating to soylent as a thing for the odd meal as he grows older.

  29. Oh, come now. Everybody knows that a liquid diet is the scientifically proven best way to eat – eliminating all that tiresome old-fashioned, nay, Stone Age, chewing nonsense. It’s demonstrated in the classic Ralph 124C41+, where the hero and heroine go to a swish New York restaurant to suck pre-masticated slurry out of nozzles hanging from the ceiling – clearly the very haute-est of haute cuisine. Do you doubt Hugo Gernsback?

  30. I hate cooking and having a serious shoulder injury that includes a partial separation makes me very careful of putting any weight on it, so do shopping at the local Hannaford’s is out. Fortunately I staff the local food pantry which is literally across the street at the nearest Catholic Church.

    We get lots of fresh veggies, a more than decent selection of meat and fish, lots of sweets and bread. And then there’s the stuff from our local Trader Joe’s which can be, errr, strange like lots of their sandwiches and sushi. Year sushi.

    It also includes their chicken pies, lasagna, rice based dishes and even salads which are delicious if eaten promptly. There’s even their chocolate from time to time which is very, very good.

  31. I’ve had some of the “nutritional shakes” that are sold as dietary supplements. When your system is complaining about food – any kind of food – those are much better than nothing.

  32. Reminds me of the Observers’ food pills.
    Observer 1: We have evolved away from the need for bodies and language.
    Observer 2: Can you guess what else we’ve evolved away from the need for?
    Crow: Oooh! Oooh! I know. Food!
    Observer 1: That is correct.
    Observer 2: We obtain all of our nutritional needs from these tiny pills.
    Mike: So I Imagine one of these pills contains all the nutrients a body needs in a day?
    Observer 1: Oh lord no, one pill would hardly suffice.
    Tom: So two maybe three pills?
    Observer 2: No, you see you simply place the pills into this ‘bowl’ and using a device known to us as a ‘spoon’…
    Crow: So one smallish bowl of pills a day?
    Observer 1: At least three or four…
    Observer 2: … seven to ten bowls a day.
    Tom: For this body you… don’t… need?
    (Mike, meanwhile, has cooked a lovely pill omelet.)

  33. 10) I’m pretty sure they the next major legislation for Food Stamps will be to limit them to be only good for purchasing Soylent. In spite of the greater exprnse and lower efficiency, this will have major benefits:
    1.A techbro millionaire will make a huge profit
    2. Poor people will be punished for the crime of deciding to be poor. Which is after all, one of the important things poor people need, according to the wealthy.

  34. I have not tried Soylent, but I frequently partake of various nutrition bars and shakes.

    I like cooking — sometimes — but often it’s just too much trouble to stop and actually think about or deal with food. In fact, I tend to gravitate towards eating just one meal a day, which I know perfectly well isn’t good for me. It’s much easier for me to maintain a well-spaced intake (5 or 6 small meals per day) if I have something like bars or shakes (and things like fresh fruit, raw veggies, and tubs of yogurt) sitting around.

  35. My husband had to get bone grafts in his jaw last year—three sessions, six weeks of Thou Shalt Not Chew after each—and he LIVED on Soylent. Still grabs one occasionally if there’s not lunch stuff in the house or if he can’t get away from the desk.

    Stuff looks like DudeBro Slimfast to me, but eh, if it works for people, great. I’m sure as hell not cooking.

  36. Another obscure title suggestion:
    “Up forty or better on your right scroll, corp’r’l, or the pixels’ll degauss your files!”

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