As dictated by Dimitri, speaking for himself, Sasha, Lulu, and Madeline.

By Dimitri: Mom called us to the kitchen using her voice that means “treats!” So we showed up, all except Madeline who refuses to admit she lives with the rest of us even after nearly two years. She has to get a special invitation. I guess she was downstairs on the couch, pretending she doesn’t know us.

Mom waved this stick at me and it smelled delicious! I love carbs. I’ll jump on the counter and rip open a bag of bread to eat it all up. Maybe it’s because I was found starving under a dumpster.

Anyway. The stick was delicious! Mom tore off bits for me and I gobbled them up. Wow. I’ll eat this again and after what my sisters did, I’ll get to eat that entire box!

Lulu showed up. She’s slim but you should see her eat. She sniffed the stick. She even got up on her hind legs like she does when mom gives us sliced roast beef. But she snubbed it. I know she’ll eat fish treats. Maybe this had too many carbs. Lulu doesn’t like carbs. That’s why she’s so scrawny. Even when mom broke off little bites and put them on the floor — pushing me away! — she wouldn’t eat the salmon stick bits. So I ate them.

Sasha usually hogs the treats. That’s why she’s so fat. She was feral once. That’s how she got the tipped ear, when someone rescued her and she ended up with us. She has no shame when it comes to begging for treats. She sniffed the stick and recoiled like it smelled like it had been sitting in a dumpster for weeks. Mom broke the stick into little bites and skittered them across the kitchen floor. Sasha played with the bites but she wouldn’t eat them, like she’ll wolf down our other treats. So I ate them.

Then mom went downstairs to find Madeline. She’s super-fluffy and I guess that’s why she thinks she’s better than us shorthairs. She sniffed the treat stick. I know because I followed mom downstairs hoping for another bite. You never know with Madeline. Sometimes she’ll accept a treat, like she’s doing you a favor. When mom broke the treat stick into bites, she liked it enough to get up and eat them. But only three. So I ate the rest.

I loved the Sheba salmon sticks. I’ll eat them again. Lucky for me, I’ll get the entire box to myself because Madeline probably will have to be coaxed, and Lulu and Sasha both thought they were icky.

Lulu who eats freeze-dried minnows and Sasha who’ll beg for anything. Go figure.

But that means more for me!